Lies- The good kind.

Oh my gosh you guys, isn't it great when someone assumes something about you thats better than your real life?!?

I recently got in a car accident, and because of incredibly unreal circumstances, I had to fly to Utah to purchase a new car. More on this later. I brought my dog on the flight to Utah. More on this later. During the flight, the flight attendant brought me my tomato juice and begin small talking me. I told him I was going to SLC to buy a car and drive it back to L.A. because that is where we lived (meaning me and my dog). "I hope you get back to your husband safely," he cheered. His teeth were so white. Like he got photoshopped, but in real life. I glanced down at my ring finger, (see tangent) it was empty as were the rest of my fingers. I smiled a huge smile at him that seemed to shoo him away.

TANGENT-

A while ago, I worked on an Academy Award winning film entitled Frat Party(no I'm not posting a link to the trailer!). I'm totally lying about the Academy Award part. It was a pretty crappy film- think American Pie meets Paris Hilton. I worked in the art department. Part of my job was to make sure the main character had on her engagement ring (which I purchased at Walmart) in the right scenes (because everything is shot out of order). After the shoot was over, I would wear the ring on a variety of outings including grocery store shopping, taking my dog to school, and of course, hiking. sue me.

TANGENT OVER-


The rest of the flight, I could hardly wipe the silly grin off my face. Partly because I felt like I was getting away with something equivalent to a bank robbery, partly because I was so excited I was married to such a great man and we had such amazing kids. Of course since I was little, I have been picturing my future family. But was I there yet? I am so used to being Alison Brough- stays up late and sleeps in, moves to strange towns with no notice, eats lean cuisine every night and watches The Notebook way more often than should be legal. Was I ready to be Alison Brough- sleeps on the right side of the bed while my husband sleeps on the left, plans my day around nap times, cooks dinners that don't come in a box?

The weirdest things trigger my future family day dreams. I'll be walking through Walmart and stop to play a video game with a controller that only has three working buttons. Suddenly I'm at my wedding. Somehow it takes place on a sunny beach and in a snowy winter cabin. Everyone is throwing there heads back laughing and toasting glittering flutes of something or other. In the corner there are 3 or 4 flat screens equipped with every boy video game imaginable (and of course Mario Brothers for me). That way all my friends can stay at my wedding all night without their husbands nagging them to leave, because their husbands will be knee-deep in a halo tournament. Just as we step outside to run barefoot on the beach, Im suddenly back in the Walmart. Mario has died and the 11-year-old behind me is jonesing for his turn.

I peruse the isles of Walmart- still thinking about my husband. He's hilarious. I'm pretty sure he wears glasses. He's probably a chef. That will be our hilarious irony. He will cook himself fancy dishes of caviar and scallops with touches of lavender and dashes of truffle oil and he will make me a pb & j with a side of brusselsprouts (my fave- on fancy nights he'll cut up banana slices on the peanut butter side). But he'll love me a lot. Not despite the fact that I have the tasting palate of a 6th grader, but because of it. Just like I will love how he sings super loud and off key in the shower and the car. And how he throws things at the tv when "his team" is losing.

As for our kids- they are a mess. But cute. You know the messy-cute kind of kids. Hair is equal parts curly and tangled. Little bit of happy meal ketchup on their cute little cheeks. Wearing hot pink moon boots in the middle of summer. But they will say things like "yes ma'am" and "thank you sir" and "my mommy says cheese is a food group." We'll make lots of home movies of us jumping in piles of fall leaves and sledding trash can lids down hills that are freshly blanketed in snow. And when they are old enough, we will definitely have board game night. I will have no mercy when I dominate monopoly.

I wonder. Is this what that flight attendant saw when he willed me to return safely to my husband?

If you're not hoping for something, you might as well be dead. Right?

My hope is that my day-dream family always feels like this. Even when they're my real family. Like I'm getting away with a crime or something. I'll walk the isles of Walmart with a perma-smile thinking how awesome my husband and kids are. And then one of my kids will trip on their moon boots and bust their face on the Walmart store floor.